What’s your motivation to do things? And why does it matter?

What I have been thinking a lot about is my motivation to do different things and how it influences both my behaviour and its results.

For example: before a presentation I may notice that I am nervous. As I reflect on this feeling I notice that I worry that I may be criticised by the listeners.

So if I go a present without being conscious about this feeling then a lot of the “why” and consequently the “what” and “how” I present is to gain acceptance from the crowd.

The fear will be an unconscious driver of my behaviour and I will do and say things to make sure I am seen as professional. This will actually be contra productive.

If the reason I am doing something is because of myself then my behaviour cannot be as effective as it would be If I focused on being beneficial to others.

Of course we driven by many things, and part of these will be egoistic and other parts will be more “altruistic”, but the main questions are: are you conscious of your different motivations? And what is the primary motivator of your behaviour?

I have noticed that professionally things work out better if my primary motivation is non-egoic - meaning that I aim to be valuable to someone else.

So for example if I am able to focus on giving the listener something valuable that they may apply in their daily life, then the presentation will be much more effective compared to a presentation where I’m obsessed with how I present myself.

I will be much less nervous and stressed out as my focus is on the other and not only on myself.

Therefore here are some tips if you are interested developing your motivation (in whatever context):
- When you feel stressed, nervous or anxious before some action or social context: stop and reflect
- Usually the stress has something to do with “me” and social acceptance
- Instead of pushing the anxiety away, feel and accept it completely (important step!)
- Think about another more constructive motive for what you are doing, like being useful to others or connecting with people
- Go out and act with this new motivation in mind
- Reflect on how your motivation influenced how you feel and the outcomes of your behaviour